Sunday 5 April 2009

my heart bleeds

toil

we should appreciate all those people who work for our happiness..
we should show them how much appreciated they are for the hardwork they do,
day in day out, just so we are given the best in life...


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my mind is with a girl named Tina today. (or at least that was her name).

i met her at the bank, while in the queue (she was before me) i could tell she was trying to make eye contact. i smiled and made "chika" asked her where she works and which part of the philippines she's from.

after a small talk, eventually, i knew half of her life story.

she is married, with 3 children (ranging from 8,6 and5years old). she had a son who died (which she was teary eyed when she talked, and said she was unable to go home when he died..i wanted to cry for her too). i could tell she was the most, my age, or even younger. she is pretty, slim and long black hair. she works as a domestic here in the UK.

she just came from Russia,as a domestic to a Russian lawyer there, but after working there for two years,she pleaded from her bosses to help her move to a different "amo"because of the hardship she has to go through every single day in Russia.

anecdotes that made me feel sorry for her...- 15 filipina's live in one bedroom, to which each pay 200 dollars. only 4 are legally allowed to stay in the bedroom, so the 11 are illegally paying into the rent. so everytime the landlord comes to collect, all the 11 has to go out and should not be seen until the landlord goes home. one time, some of her co-boarders were caught, they were put in a police cell where they were abused...
-on their way to work in the train filipinas will be abused (verbally) groped and even sexuallyharassed and no one would help (the other russian passengers will just look on). Tina had been twice groped on her breasts and one time a drunk russian man was harassing her for sex in the train. she thought she was going to die. thank goodness,she was able to jump in one of the stops.

her employers after two years eventually let her go (after hearing her story and difficulty in Russia) and recommended her to one of their friends who was British lawyer married to a Russian lady. which led Tina to work and move here in the UK as a nanny and domestic to the British lawyer and his Russian lawyer.

so far, she's only worked in the UK since Februarythis year, and she's feeling so homesick and missing her children. i wanted to hug her. i knew how she felt. but at least, i have adrian to talk to.

she said,she has saturday evening and sunday morning off,and she said,she locks herself in her room (which doesnt help).i gave her my mobile number and asked for hers. i said, since she lives quite far from where i live (a two hour drive), i would love to invite her to the house, every now and again, so that i could introduce her to some people,so that her network will widen.

i waited for her to finish her business in the bank, and introduced her to adrian. we invited her for coffee and lunch but she declined saying her bosses are already waiting for her to go back. i said she should call me if she feels sad, or feels in any danger at all, or she needed a friend. she promised to call me.

i hope she does.

i cried to adrian. i feel life is not fair on some people. i moan about my life, but really, who am i to complain? Tina has a difficult life, and i wish i could help her, just by being her friend. i hope she does not feel so homesick anymore.

i wonder if her husband knew how much hardwork she had to go through? considering he doesnt work and is in the philippines, living a quite comfortable lifestyle(according to Tina)...i feel for her.


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anyone of you missing your love ones today? let me send you my hugs.

9 comments:

Aileen said...

i agree, about appeciating those who work for our happiness. =)

i feel sad for tina, chel. i know of many stories like that, people who sacrifice, experienced so many hardships in the hands of thos who are cruel.

it's very nice of you to offer your friendship to her. =)

plain jin said...

chel, gikumot akong dughan nagbasa ani...about Tina, about making sacrifices a few would often think absurd, senseless, and so "Filipino". unya kay Filipino man jud ta?!!shocks. sorry. that's another blog entry. :hide:

*hugs* chel. give my hugs to Tina, too, when you see her again, hopefully.

hiddenrage said...

i agree, about appeciating those who work for our happiness. =)

i feel sad for tina, chel. i know of many stories like that, people who sacrifice, experienced so many hardships in the hands of thos who are cruel.

it's very nice of you to offer your friendship to her. =)

- - -

naluoy kaayo ko niya ai...nakahilak gyud ko kang ading...i feel kabata pa niya to undergo all these hardships...its bad enough to have ll these problems when you have friends and family around you, how much more when you have no one to talk to and unload to?

hiddenrage said...

chel, gikumot akong dughan nagbasa ani...about Tina, about making sacrifices a few would often think absurd, senseless, and so "Filipino". unya kay Filipino man jud ta?!!shocks. sorry. that's another blog entry. :hide:

*hugs* chel. give my hugs to Tina, too, when you see her again, hopefully.

---

hi jane, she promised to call,but murag shy man to siya kaayo.if she wont call, i will call her after the holy week to give her time to think and readjust..

mao gyud akong na feel jane. nag luhaluha gyud siya when she was talking about her kids, and how much she missed them..esp wala siya pagkamatay sa usa niya ka anak..sakit kaayo huna-hunaon...ang iyang husband walay work, siya intawn tanan.i hope things should getter for her now na nia na siya sa england...

the good news is, naka remember ko, naa man diay koy friends na nurses duol where she lived. maybe i could introduce them.

Mommy Blogs said...

this is a very sad story chel... but it's the reality to some. all these for a meager salary! but they are honest workers making a living, trying to make ends meet, and getting that very thin slice of a pie.

although her harassment stories in russia are not really peculiar only to domestics. they have a different culture and they need retraining on how to respect women. i have seen how siberians harassed the contestants of the amazing race, and recalled the movie borat (which i didn't finish because i was somewhat disgusted by its joke...)

as to her husband living the life, lami kaayo gabson iyang itlog!

hiddenrage said...

"this is a very sad story chel... but it's the reality to some. all these for a meager salary! but they are honest workers making a living, trying to make ends meet, and getting that very thin slice of a pie. "

luoy gyud ko niya che..murag lisud man gud iyang family sa Cabanatuan. im sure she wouldnt have gone through with all that if she didnt have hardships..

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"although her harassment stories in russia are not really peculiar only to domestics. they have a different culture and they need retraining on how to respect women. i have seen how siberians harassed the contestants of the amazing race, and recalled the movie borat (which i didn't finish because i was somewhat disgusted by its joke...)"


some eastern european countries do have history of racial discrimination and abuse, but slowly they are getting more and more educated that some parts of the world arent white. its so sad lang gyud, that she had to go through that no? and be lonely and be so far from her children. gikumot akng dughan.


* * *

"as to her husband living the life, lami kaayo gabson iyang itlog!"

amen!

Shutterfairy said...

I got teary eyed when I read this entry.. how cruel some people are. I was trying to imagine what I'll do if someone will grope my breast.. will I be able to do flying kicks kaha and a sagpa here and there considering that I am in another country.

She's brave.. and far away.. I hope one day, she will find people (aside from meeting you) that will protect her and respect her and what she does for a living.

hiddenrage said...

"I got teary eyed when I read this entry.. how cruel some people are. I was trying to imagine what I'll do if someone will grope my breast.. will I be able to do flying kicks kaha and a sagpa here and there considering that I am in another country."

mai, nagsakit gyud akong dughan...i felt for her gyud when she was telling me her story..sus mai, ayaw intawn ug work anywhere where you feel your safety is compromised...but mao gyud nang lucky ta kaayo compared to Tina, we dont have to undergo what she went through..

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"She's brave.. and far away.. I hope one day, she will find people (aside from meeting you) that will protect her and respect her and what she does for a living."

mao gyud na akong gisulti..she is soo brave..if that was me, i would have left and bahala nakang money diha...i really would not stand for it...but who are we to say, her needs might have been very bad...i feel she's safer here..in fact UK is safer than any other european coountry you could work for,but sobra lang gyud siya ka homesick, and she feels isolated because she works on her own now, and wala na siyay ka boardmates na mga pinay...i do wish the same for her too...

trinity said...

*sniff*